Here is the post from yesterday that I deleted this morning trying to get rid of a weird comment. On re-reading it I find I'm not as down this afternoon as I was last night when I wrote this; looks like God is winning the battle!
Ups and Downs
Posted Yesterday at 10:25pm
It has been one of those up and down kind of days.First, the “up” part: I was able to get my “Monday” stuff done at church today and even got my message ready for Good Friday. The message is a meditation on one of Jesus’ sayings from the cross: “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit” Luke 23:46. It was good to have some quality study time meditating on the cross. I hope to have more of these special times with God this week.
The down part is that I struggled with disappointment today over the small crowd we had on Sunday. I knew it was coming; spring break means we’re going to have lots of people out. But even though I was prepared for that, the crowd size disappointed me. I confess I have a unhealthy preoccupation with numbers. I know the true measure of success for every church is how well they are fulfilling their God-given mission. But still, when 22 families are out in a church our size it hurts.
God was good to me though. After church when I walked out to my car I noticed one of our communication cards stuck under my windshield wiper. A child had written on it, “Pastor Steve, You are appreciated and loved. Thanks for all you do." Thanks my young friend. And thanks God for the encouragement.
The lesson in all this, of course, is that it is God’s church and not mine (Matt. 16:18). Furthermore, the battle itself is the Lord’s, not mine (1 Samuel 17:45-47). It does not matter whether the battle is “out there” or “in here" (in me),” because the battle is the Lord’s. David knew that when he faced Goliath, Joshua knew it as he circled the walls of Jericho, and Peter and Paul knew it as they faced their challenges too.
Perhaps in this special week where God overcame even something as debilitating and as final as death, God can teach me and change me too.
Lord, hear my prayer.
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